Well, actually, it's true. You can't really go back. That is, unless your husband just happens to pick up your old diary when he's looking for some 'light reading,' and you're compelled to wonder just what you might have said about who or what or......LOL!!
Awhile back, SGTex did that-came across the journal I'd kept while living in Ireland and spent a month in Wales and England, way back when. He's been reading snippets from it and asking me questions from time to time. I had to laugh this morning at his facial expression when he was sitting here looking through it.
Who was that Shawn, anyway? I have to wonder, when he reads aloud some of what I had to say back then about what was going on in my life. I sound somewhat domestic (still am, or aim to be). I was an educator (have left that laying to the side, for now), an artist, an accidental tourist on some days, and spent quite a bit of time with a bunch of women (now it's just the One Man)..... Anyway, it's kinda fun to think back and find out just how much I'd forgotten along the journey from there to here. Right now I could tell you exactly what I'd do differently, what I'd not miss seeing or experiencing, if given the chance for a do-over. Someday I'd love to take SGTex and show him all the old places and see some things I missed seeing the last time I was there.
One thing that astonished me was how little I'd said about one of the most wonderful experiences of that whole time, visiting Tintern Abbey-- all by myself. The winter blue sky (January), the green grass and all that was left of that structure, with nothing to listen to but a bit of bird song...and the fox hunt off in the distance. Later we met that fox, btw....haha. All I said about that in the journal was a parenthetical (liked it). Must've been very tired that night, ;~).
It makes me think just how important it is, when having a "moment," to absolutely say what needs to be said, right at the time, and if there's a hint of "specialness" or chance of it being a meaningful moment, I just might want to make a note, so I can remember all about it years later...
Another thing I did when I was living there was to take pictures of things which served as a reminder of those moments. To anyone else, a shot of a phone box or a bicycle or a green water pump alongside the road might seem silly, but to me it represents feelings and fragrances and waves of emotion...Like the time I came around the bend in the road and was engulfed in the sound and sight and flurry of trumpeter swans making their descent to their nesting area in our back yard, which bordered the River Liffey. Another amazing experience....
Well, all of it was.
Shawn
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photo courtesy of: Aimee Dolich
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