Saturday, August 19, 2017
This photo spoke to me. I can imagine my life being filled with shadows and dark, mysterious places that hold the frayed bits of memory of days long gone.
Back then, did I appreciate how simple life was? Was I aware of the beauty and kindness of those dear people who cared about me and loved me? Did I know how soon so many would be passing from sight, crossing The River into their next existence, having been "promoted" (according to one of the dearest of all)?
The colored light reminds me that those were pretty easy days shared with great people.
It's a blessing to have family and friends at hand, and it's time well spent and never wasted when one can be with people who genuinely care.
at 10:03 PM
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
Sunday, July 30, 2017
You know, try as you might, your attempt at keeping an even keel (what is that, anyway?) and wanting a normal routine, peaceable coexistence at home with everybody on the same page and heading the same direction can be flat-out ruined when it's not, shall we say, important to all interested (or disinterested) parties.
I know. That was the longest run-on sentence and it just barely makes sense.
I am currently at a crossroads. Continue with how things are, or....what? Answers are elusive. I can't do any more changing in the attempt at pleasing when there is no pleasing to be had. That half-full cup is always half empty, you know.
This all might seem pretty vague to you, but you'll just have to read between the lines or disregard. I'm pretty sure that any speculation as to what may or may not be going on with me would pale next to the reality.
I know, many say that God is good all the time, and that's nice. Others have more serious things with which to deal, and perhaps I can "endure." Someday I might tell you why I dislike the word "endure."
So, this is me, feeling kinda blue and bewildered.
at 10:56 AM
Saturday, June 24, 2017
Good manners. It's always been important to me to remember the little ditty my mother (the one who reared me, not the bio mother who deserted me without ever looking at me) ---anyway--the little ditty my mother basically branded on my fanny:
We love you, and we want other people to love you, too.
What that meant was this: Always be polite and use your best manners and people will love you, or like you, or at least enjoy your company, or at worst tolerate your presence.
Do you know what? Not necessarily so. HAH.
It has come to my attention that I can do all the right things and be as proper and polite as can be and say "please" and "thank you" and make sure the person with whom I deal or am depending on for help and am causing inconvenience knows how much I appreciate it....and BAM!!!! It backfires.
Have I been duped? Good manners are considered to be "pretentiousness." Is that even a word? My attempt to show gratitude (which has been genuine, by the way) has been basically flung back in my face.
It's beginning to dawn on me that some of the words I heard and took to be concern and care might have been something else. In other words, I've been giving credit where it wasn't necessarily due.
Lesson to me: Get real. Quit being a sap. Sometimes people aren't as noble as you'd like them to be. Or need them to be.
In the middle of the night, Texas time.
at 4:41 AM
Sunday, June 11, 2017
Earlier today I heard someone say that it wasn't a good idea to let yesterday's disappointments dictate tomorrow's decisions.
Or something like that.
Anyway, it gave me something to consider. I have lots of time on my hands these days to do plenty of thinking, and I'm starting to wonder if that's a good idea. I used to not mind alone time and enjoyed my own company, but that was when everything I loved doing was close by and I was being creative and doing just what I pleased, pretty much. Other people were near by who shared the same interests and appreciated my gardening or efforts in the kitchen. The antique dealers liked to see me coming because they'd obtained items with me in mind and I could be separated from my $$ pretty easily- haha! Now the alone time is something I do not enjoy. At all.
I think what I started to say was that rather than doing some of the things I love to do, I've been limited (for various reasons) to just thinking about them. I can reminisce, wonder how to do them here in a totally different world (or so it seems to me) or plan on a future that seems far off in the distance.
Whatever happens, I am going to try and not let the past negatives have such an effect on the potential future.
at 1:27 PM
Thursday, May 11, 2017
Thankfully, a blog reader left a comment which I stopped by to answer, or I may not have ever gotten something said in May.
I really don't know what to say, other than lately my stress level has been stuck at "whiny" much of the time. Things will get pretty excruciating over the next month or so, and then we should be able to breathe deeply and feel it's safe to peek out from under the sheet on most mornings. I know I'm being somewhat vague, so will just drop a clue when I say "Oh, did you hear about the couple who sued their bank?" Boyhowdy,
We're going to manage just fine, thanks. I'll be back soon and have something to say. Maybe something actually meaningful.
at 6:03 PM
Monday, April 10, 2017
FB trolls be advised: We support compassionate interventions in Syria, even when conceived by the likes of Trump
I'm no Trump fan, but I care about the Syrian population's plight and would be ashamed if we, the USA, sat on our hands and still did nothing to retaliate against the use of gas by the Syrian government on its own people.
If you want to moan and groan about Trump "starting a war" or distracting from XYZ, then go ahead, but I won't be agreeing much with anyone who's not had word one to say about those who've lost everything and everyone, just because they had the misfortune to dwell in a country that is being systematically destroyed by the monster at the top.
You who are disgusted and wish to complain about the USA doing something to put its foot down and shake its saber at Syria's corrupt leader are entitled to your opinions, but until you've watched the news, seen the videos, been FB friended by people who live in that hellish situation, please just hold your tater when passing near my newsfeed. I beg your pardon, but—
--it appears my Irish is a bit up at the mo
at 11:27 AM
Saturday, April 8, 2017
Saturday, March 18, 2017
Thursday, February 23, 2017
I questioned myself and came up with the "don't throw away those letters or pictures" and "be more forthcoming in your journal and keep it up." I think really there must be a journal's worth of good ideas that the younger me would have been able to use, had the younger me been so inclined.
Meanwhile, this picture says it all.
at 1:26 PM
Friday, February 3, 2017
I wish for you all the lady luncheon style shows, shopping sprees to Seattle, Frango chocolates, designer linens, Finnware, Best Sellers, camellia and rhody bouquets, pastries and plain cake donuts, pots of coffee, meat market sausages on a string, lime molded salads and finger sandwiches you shared with me. Annual holiday shopping trips to Seattle to see what color Frederick's and The Bon would do and visits to Santa were a delight to me. Coming home with something new to show Grandpa, the giant shopping bags and Christmas Carolers singing were the stuff of my dreams.
You didn't know how much your kindnesses to others and trips to the library and historical museum would stick with me. It meant a lot that you didn't tire of going downstairs to see Ezra Meeker's covered wagon and the mummy every single time we visited.
You didn't know that the trips you took to far away places inspired me to do the same, and your letters meant the worlds to me.
You couldn't imagine that your baby picture would hang on our bedroom wall in Texas, but it does.
Thanks a million, as you'd say.
at 4:54 PM
Friday, January 20, 2017
Are they yet to be fulfilled? Were they lost? Did I just up and hand them over to someone else who didn't want to be my dream keeper?
Over share them?
Where are they now? Gone? Or just on hold?
at 2:41 AM
Friday, December 16, 2016
I wrote the following a year and a half ago. Nowadays I am so aghast at our anomalous president-elect that I am temporarily kind of dumbstruck, but it looks as though some of my prior commentary still applies. Well, in my opinion, anyway.
|John Kleese does Hitler|
"Maranatha, come Lord Jesus." -Michelle Bachman
U.S. politics has so polarized that any complementarity the factions might once have acknowledged has hardened into stubborn partisanship. That’s just as unfortunate, certainly, as President Obama makes it sound; however, at least it clarifies things – much like dialing the “contrast” setting all the way up on an old television.
Didn’t people once recall with nostalgia a “simpler time,” exemplified by movies in black and white? Now an era is upon us when the issues are pretty clear-cut. In fact, it all seems to be shaping up into a frank battle between good and evil. Optimistically speaking, it’s reasonable to hope for a favorable outcome (eventually, anyway) because the good guys are intelligent and the bad guys are idiots.
As I have shown before, liberalism is associated with education, science and progress while conservatism is based on willful ignorance, misleading religion and backwardness.
The distinction is even plainer on a global scale than it is here at home. The U.N. and NATO, though somewhat ineffective to date, represent hope for the Family of Man. Where does one see the opposite of that? Syria and Iraq, of course, in a foul and subhuman social disease known as ISIS, next to which Hitler’s goons look like the Beatles. But that axis of absurd cruelty bears out my theory, for their depravity is directly related to conservatism founded in the extreme ignorance of perverse, medieval religion.
I’m sure most will agree that ISIS is fully half again as bad as the American Family Association.
On the sentinel issues such as marriage equality, reproductive freedom, gun control, immigration and separation of church and state, you’d think America would have settled matters for good by now – but danged if conservatives haven’t come down squarely in the wrong and stayed there for decades, fouling up society something awful.
As if all that weren’t bad enough, abuses of the extreme right wing persist and worsen ad nauseam in the life-and-death matter of environmental/energy policy. The gods must surely be dismayed to see Alberta, Canada laid to waste by the filthiest industry in history, whose ambition is to export the ooze of that disaster to the rest of the world. But isn’t a similar malady afflicting Texas? What could be stupider than poisoning the groundwater while raping the drought-stricken earth night and day? Signs no less ominous than seismic tremors are being ignored by the corporate lapdogs our elderly keep sending to Austin. I don’t understand why responsible Texans aren’t out there toppling rigs.
Insanely reckless industrial pollution is attributable in large part to distorted religion, of the sort that teaches “the world” (our planet) is a thing to be disdained and abandoned; that these are the fabled “end times” and nothing Man can do but hosannah hallaloo and pass the ammunition. Subterranean Texas would appear to be as outta luck these days as polar bears and unarmed black males.
at 6:02 PM
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
I haven't really known what to say, for some reason. I still don't, but have been thinking about the Father Christmas collection that was lost and now long gone, so I will just put up a lovely picture and imagine nice things that I wish had come to make happy the lovely, lost children of Aleppo.
at 6:58 PM
Sunday, October 30, 2016
This little goblin makes me smile.
Gods know we need to lighten up, what with politics here in the USA. We voted early for Hillary and will hope for the best. The Standing Rock Sioux and pipeline vs water issues is big, or it ought to be.
I find myself looking at people who seem to never have issue-oriented Facebook posts and wonder what is wrong with them. Haha! It's more like what's wrong with me! Why aren't they worried? Why don't they have something to say about anything other than their frivolities? How come they yada yada yada, anyway? Maybe. truth be told, these friends are a bit ahead of me and know that it's not a bad thing, keeping it light... Hmmm.
This little goblin makes me smile.
There are such sadnessses and sins committed against the planet and lack of gratitude for her Gaia gifts to us. What can I do, but spread the word about the needs and concerns as best as I can and be grateful for my husband who shares in my caring and works hard to make good money so we can give some monetary help to our favorite causes. (Thanks again, Mister)
Then encouragement comes when I see that a petition did its job to make a change for the good. Or how about the anti-poaching statistics as to how many animals have been spared, or video clips of happy bears or elephants adjusting to a peaceful life of leisure? The high anxiety felt as we wait for elephants or bears in India or Asia to be rescued in the night and trucked away to safety causes me to check for good news every time I wake up and wonder how far along the road to freedom have they come? Are they home yet? Reading about Chinese people rescuing stolen and stray dogs from the doom of the dog meat trade makes me grateful for changing hearts and steps forward to enlightenment. The ongoing protest at Taiji teaches patience and persistence and gratitude for the heroic efforts on behalf of the dolphins. Countries making decisions to respect as sentient beings and giving rights to animals is wonderful.
This is the stuff that fills my heart and my head most of the time, and when I'm behaving myself and having the right attitude, minding my own business, I'm grateful for some of the less serious-minded of my peeps and their frivolities and will. of course, wish to share in the fun:
This little goblin makes me smile.
at 7:06 AM
Thursday, October 20, 2016
You people really need to take care of your own problems, as do we. If we can manage that, rather than finger point and eyeroll at what's happening in places we don't call home, we'll be better caretakers of the planet.
at 12:16 PM
Saturday, October 8, 2016
I'd really appreciate it if the deer in Texas could refrain from hurtling themselves at my husband's car when he's driving the 90 miles home after working a 12+ hour shift all night.
He's not particularly interested in being one of his own patients, and we were just fine with the car the way it was, tyvm.
And now to process the near catastrophe.
(He came stalking in the house all handsome in his scrubs without so much as a mustache hair out of place.)
The car, otoh....
Now: Different new car. Same mustache.
at 3:25 PM
Thursday, September 8, 2016
Somebody come here and stop me from going off on the person/s whining and carrying on about 'how awful these days are for America.'
As crazy as it is here in the USA, it still beats the 2nd and 3rd world nations.
Most of my readers are not Syrians wondering when the sky will ever quit raining down hell on us. We're not Filipinos eating someone's dog for dinner. We're not Afghani women denied an education or the opportunity to make choices. The Taliban is somewhere else, and we are free to express outrage when things don't go our way. We have the freedom to come and go in this country without paying exorbitant prices for gas and have the power to protest what we feel has negative effects on our environment. We can debate and argue and raise hell when we disagree and have the ability to learn and apply our truth to our lives. We can watch the news and pick and choose what we see and hear.
It's still up to us to turn it on or shut it off.
We don't have to believe America isn't great enough, because it is.
at 7:57 PM
Wednesday, September 7, 2016
Sunday, August 28, 2016
I stated this charming little ditty in what was an attempt at an early morning conversation (I should know better) with my husband. He said some things about it which prompted one of my I'net searches and I found that these words come out of the 16th century as a nursery rhyme. It's called a English language proverb.
Wikipedia suggests lyrics as:
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches, I'd wear one by my side.
If "if's" and "and's" were pots and pans,
There'd be no work for tinkers' hands.
... and a shorter version:
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
If turnips were bayonets, I'd wear one by my side.
- The Wikipedia article turned out to be really interesting to me, and it was quite reassuring, in that I had remembered the words correctly and it was an entirely appropriate thing to say, given the context of what might have been a lovely, cozy conversation. I seem to recall a table discussion in one of my college literature classes during the Olde English study periods, now that I think of it. I think I'm going to look up something on "pillow talk" next.
at 7:13 AM
Saturday, August 13, 2016
"They" say we make our own happiness. I don't really believe that. My happiness can be right "here" these days and just disappear in a flash, or drain away before I can get my bearings. How does that happen? I've let life get the best of me and I'm more controlled by the doings or undoings of someone other than me. When the who and what I am is diminished to the point where I'm about to disappear...
Well, I'd better just fall back on one of my boyhowdys. Or would that be boyhowdies?
at 9:27 AM
Wednesday, July 27, 2016
Tuesday, June 28, 2016
Sunday, June 26, 2016
Thursday, June 16, 2016
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Monday, June 13, 2016
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
Sunday, May 29, 2016
Thursday, May 26, 2016
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Tonight I'm here at home being grateful for our little Love Shack in our funny little dog-filled neighborhood. It's a somewhat typical Texas night with the somewhat typical night sounds to which I've become accustomed. Certain neighbors seem to come and go and there's a distant bark and, if we're lucky, the song of a lonely male mockingbird not too far off. It's probably not nearly as pleasant for him, singing his heart out after dark, as it is for me. Nice to hear and nice to note it's ceased, and I am glad to know that he's found someone to love.
We have a pair of mourning doves nesting in the eaves over the bedroom and they'll coo in the middle of the night. The pretty pigeons we hosted last spring seem to have moved next door. I guess we have a gecko under the front yard's pecan and I'm always listening for crickets.
Hah. My husband calls me Snow White for a reason, I guess.
at 9:23 PM
Saturday, April 2, 2016
Actually, they're nice company for each other and for me, too, while they're glamping in the kitchen. And of course, the neighborhood dogs out there started it all. It's a good thing to know we're in good paws here in our funny little neighborhood and all is well here in the Love Shack. It would have been better if my Man had been able to come home after the planned short shift instead of being Mr Super RN pulling an all-nighter, but they threw money at him and he's a really good sport.
at 2:15 AM
Friday, March 11, 2016
Usually, I'm more mindful of time and the weeks going by and have tried to keep up with the blog. I guess I'm aware that this has been something I thought would be fun and useful to keep as a journal of sorts. I kinda think I did that with more than a few things back in the days when I was aiming for Texas. Anyway, there are times when anything I might say would be too little to be truthful or too much for eyes other than mine. IOW, a sort of 'spit and polish' situation, so to speak. Fish or cut bait? No, that's not it. Shine up or shut up? Yeah, maybe....
As I was saying, people don't need or want to read about the down days or wishful thinking words of a not yet desperate housewife who has moments of drama queenishness. Just from time to time.
In reality, it's nice having SGTex working in the same town as our home. Long hours but lacking outrageous commute times make life better. I'm getting over an illness of several months that made me very hard to live with, so I look forward to something more normal in my activity level, but the thought of getting to that point is very intimidating, truth be told. Funny how the least little thing can appear huge and frightening--kinda like those horrific gargoyles that are merely door knockers. All I have to do is grab it by the nose and give it a good rap or two, but...
I suspect this post has been a mess, so please just drop by again soon and hopefully I'll be properly caffeinated and more grateful.
P.S. Continue to ignore Trump and his followers. Even the Republicans don't know what to do with him and his weirdness. Should he win (gods forbid), SGTex and I will be packing up the Havanese and searching for a new home away from here, so please leave the light on, world.
at 5:43 PM
Thursday, February 18, 2016
I ran on to this and thought it was just about perfect for these times. It's something I need to remember during this political season and will promise to try and be mindful.
Wouldn't this planet be a happier place if we were busy doing good deeds rather than talking bad words?
Let's keep trying.
at 7:44 PM
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
Saturday, January 16, 2016
Friday, January 1, 2016
...to those deserving a better, happier year. I saw several Facebook posts by people who are only too glad to end 2015. I was feeling sorry about that and am hopeful that better days were coming. Well, let me just say, "Me, too." All in all, I can honestly say this past year rivals the worst year of my life.
I'll spare you the details.
Let's just go with the idea that it will be different in the days to come. Why? How? I've only a hint of a clue. I'm older. Wiser to the rise...or lack of it. Not so quick to believe the best. Not so slow to let go and give one more chance to those who aren't really wanting one more chance. I've come to realize that I can't make other people believe in me or in that which I hold as my particular scruple or standard. "Not wanted" means not wanted. Same goes for "not welcome."
I'm an orchid, stuck here in prickly pear country. And it's all "open effin' carry."
I'm laying here in bed with cold morning leftover coffee watching the Rose Parade by myself on an old broken television thinking "Hah. This is Shawn...Happy New Year?"
That remains to be seen.
I'm having my doubts, at this point.
Stay tuned. Hold yer tater.
at 11:45 AM